A Gentle Reminder to Me

The Mercurial Personality Style

Intensely committed to meeting life head on, this style takes action to make its dreams a reality. They wear their emotions on their sleeves, seeking the highs of passionate romance. This unconstrained style is a risk-taker, imaginative, curious, uninhibited, and engaging.

One of the signs of this style is a tendency to be moody and difficult to approach at times. The roller-coaster style of high-energy, constant motion, intense reactions, and changing passions can leave companions drained and overwhelmed. It can be difficult for those with this style to maintain a long-term relationship. Instead, their connections can be passionate and wonderful for a while but then transform into conflict and disenchantment. It can take a special commitment to be able to hold on with this style for the long haul.

Impulse control can be a challenge for those with the Mercurial Style. They sometimes confuse being authentic with unthinkingly voicing and acting on their emotions — no matter how inappropriate those sentiments or actions might be. They like to try new things and feel it is important to have their friends try them, too. Planning is not for them. Flexibility and ability to "go with the flow" is what is important. They never know when something new and exciting might pop up, and they don't want to miss it. At work, they can make creative contributions, but they need to be recognized for the work they do or else they lose interest.

A fictional character that fits this style well is Vivian played by Julia Roberts in the 1990 movie Pretty Woman. The simple plot of the movie is that a businessman (Richard Gere) needs a woman to go with him for several official evening functions. His solution is to hire a beautiful prostitute rather than endure the complications of asking one of the women of his acquaintance. The story shows how the two fall in love with each other. Vivian is unquestionably Mercurial: fun-loving, enthusiastic, charming, and willing to take a chance to pull off the charade. As the movie unfolds, the viewer can see the intensity of her growing connection with the businessman, the strength of the attachment they forge, the despair caused by the eventual friction between them, and the glory of their final reconciliation.

Borderline....

Borderline personality disorder is often a devastating mental condition, both for the people who have it and for those around them.

Perhaps shaped by harmful childhood experiences or brain dysfunctions, people diagnosed with borderline personality disorder live in a world of inner and outer turmoil. They have difficulty regulating their emotions and are often in a state of upheaval. They have distorted images of themselves, often feeling worthless and fundamentally bad or damaged.

And while they yearn for loving relationships, people with borderline personality disorder typically find that their anger, impulsivity, stormy attachments and frequent mood swings push others away.
Over the last 10 years, increasing awareness and research are helping improve the treatment and understanding of borderline personality disorder. At the same time, it remains a controversial condition, particularly since so many more women than men are diagnosed with it, raising questions about gender bias. Although definitive data are lacking, it's estimated that 1 percent to 2 percent of American adults have borderline personality disorder (BPD). It occurs in about one in every 33 women, compared with one in every 100 men, and is usually diagnosed in early adulthood.

Contrary to lingering perceptions, emerging evidence indicates that people with BPD often get better over time and that they can live happy, peaceful lives.

Signs and symptoms

Borderline personality disorder affects how people feel about themselves, how they relate to others and how they behave.

People with BPD often have an unstable sense of who they are. That is, their self-image or sense of self often rapidly changes. They typically view themselves as evil or bad, and sometimes they may feel as if they don't exist at all. This unstable self-image can lead to frequent changes in jobs, friendships, goals, values and gender identity.

Relationships are usually in turmoil. People with BPD often experience a love-hate relationship with others. They may idealize someone one moment and then abruptly and dramatically shift to fury and hate over perceived slights or even misunderstandings. This is because people with the disorder have difficulty accepting gray areas — things are either black or white. For instance, in the eyes of a person with BPD, someone is either good or evil. And that same person may be good one day and evil the next.

In addition, people with BPD often engage in impulsive and risky behavior. This behavior often winds up hurting them, whether emotionally, financially or physically. For instance, they may drive recklessly, engage in unsafe sex, take illicit drugs or go on spending or gambling sprees. People with BPD also often engage in suicidal behavior or deliberately injure themselves for emotional relief.

Other signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder may include:
Strong emotions that wax and wane frequently
Intense but short episodes of anxiety or depression
Inappropriate anger, sometimes escalating into physical confrontations
Difficulty controlling emotions or impulses
Fear of being alone

Self-care

Living with borderline personality disorder can be difficult. You may fully realize that your behaviors and thoughts are self-destructive or damaging yet feel unable to control them. Treatment can help you learn skills to manage and cope with your condition.

Other things you can do to help manage your condition and feel better about yourself include:
Sticking to your treatment plan
Attending therapy sessions as scheduled
Practicing healthy ways to ease painful emotions, rather than inflicting self-injury
Not blaming yourself for having the disorder but recognizing your responsibility to get it treated
Learning what things may trigger angry outbursts or impulsive behavior
Not being embarrassed by having this condition
Getting treatment for related problems, such as substance abuse
Educating yourself about the disorder so you understand its causes and treatments better
Reaching out to others with the disorder to share insights and experiences

Remember, there's no one right path to recovery from BPD. The condition seems to be worse in young adulthood and may gradually get better with age. Many people with the disorder find greater stability in their lives during their 30s and 40s. Their inner misery may lessen and they go on to sustain loving relationships and enjoy meaningful careers.

Taken from.... http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/borderline-personality-disorder